Mr. Clean's Cesspool

Hey Mom and Kids

2008-08-06T18:36:00.001-04:00

Hey guys, I hope that all is well with you. I have been having fun in the afternoons geocaching. The picture to the left is a geocoin that I will be bringing home to drop off in another cache near us.

I have been to many parks near Lake Michigan. It looks alot like a ocean in the middle of the country. Maybe mom can show you were it is on the map. I am in Oak Creek, WI.

The other pictures that I have added here are pictures of the lake . It is very beautiful. Csa and Beana, the picture of the flower is for you.

Hey Mom, this is a beautiful area, I would not mind living here (hint, hint)

Love you guys and I miss you I will be home soon.
Love, Dad

A "Tree" ?

2008-07-10T19:55:00.001-04:00

Take a look at the tree in the picture. Is this really fooling anyone. I find these cell trees just ridiculous.

I kind of think this is cruel and unusually punishment for the birds. What about the Red Headed Woodpecker, does no one care that he might pound his beak into the fake bark and hurt himself. Where are the raging environmentalists crying and protesting hoping to save the Woodpecker from his certain demise.

What about the cell tree huggers where are they protecting the special tree that may get taken down to protect the woodpecker?

I think this is just a complete waste of money. Usually this is the tallest "tree" around. It sticks out like a sore thumb, lets not kid ourselves, we don't need to make it look like a tree. I bet this screws up my cell reception even more. Hey those bloody evironmentalists are screwing up everything, high gas prices since they won't let us drill and my cell phone reception. Since I bet it is them that want it to look like a tree to convince birds to make a nest there, and get cancer since they are too close to the radio waves.

Oh and I would like to know who has a company that makes towers look like trees. How much can one get paid to do this. I bet they get a crazy amount of money to do this nonsense. If I find out my tax dollars go to this, I think I will totally flip my lid and go and cut a tree down.

The Three R's ????

2008-07-10T13:29:00.002-04:00

Ok so I just thought that this was very funny, pupils failing to master the 3 R's. Hey maybe that is because they are not R's. Only one of the 3 starts with an R.

Now Maybe in West Virginia, they are still the 3 r's (reading, riting, and rithmetic) or at the Playskool company (who I believe for sometime marketed the Speak and Spell, seems a little ironic to me)

But to the rest of the world they should be READING, WRITING and ARITHMETIC, or RWA for short. Maybe this is the whole reason we are failing. Can't spell, so maybe we can't read, if we can't read how are we supposed to work on a math word problem.

Wel ntill nex tim, wrk on yur spellng wood yu pleas.

Heres a Story

2008-02-01T06:02:00.000-05:00

Here's the story of a lovely lady
Who was bringing up to 2 girls and 2 boys
3 of them had hair like their father.
The youngest in another color.

Here's the story of a man named Petersen
Who was busy with some work out on his own.
He was one man working in New Jersey
Yet he was all alone.

Till the one day when this lady mets this fellow
And they knew it was much more than a hunch
That this group would somehow get back together.
And we would again be called the Petersen Family.

Just a quick I love you to my wife for doing all she does when I am not home. See you soon 143!

Check Out My New Blog

2007-10-17T18:56:00.000-04:00

I have decided to keep the Family site and my other Rants seperate. I started a new blog site at.

Raging Rants on Religious Non-Sense and other Post Modern Drivel.

Check it out.

Never Forget !

2007-10-06T22:20:00.000-04:00

Is it just me or does it seem like most of the leadership in this country has forgotten what happened on 9/11/01. They seem to be more concerned about global warming and saving the environment instead of saving people and protecting our country. I could care less about the trees in this country if we are not free to enjoy them. If the Islamic terrorists are more concerned about killing us shouldn't we be more concerned about defending ourselves. I don't see the terrorists burning down the forests. I see them flying planes full of innocent people into buildings. They don't care about the trees they care about serving a false god that they call Allah.

Maybe our country as a whole ought to get our heads out of the sand and deal with the real issues of defense of our country from outsiders and from the people inside our country (our own citizens) that want to tear down everything that pertains to God.

God is the only one that can save us, but our country wants to chuck him under the bus. Why is that, maybe because they don't like what their conscience tells them, that what they are doing is wrong! You don't have to believe in God to know that. Lucky you, God gave you a conscience and it works the way he designed it. You may be able to dull it but you will never get rid of it.

So I see this country getting rid of God and I feel that his wrath will be forth coming.
Romans 2:5 "but because of your stubbornness and your unrepentant heart, you are storing up wrath against yourself for the day of God's wrath, when his righteous judgment will be revealed.
2 Thessalonians 1:8-9 "He will punish those who do not know God and do not obey the gospel of our Lord Jesus. They will be punished with everlasting destruction and shut out of the presence of the Lord and from the majesty of his power".

Does that like the warm and fuzzy all loving God that lots of preachers are teaching these days. Not to me, it sounds like the just God that he is.

So below is a video that I think all of Washington ought to watch again. In my opinion this is the primary issue facing this country at the next election, not global warming (which we as a country will never solve, hence the word GLOBAL, why does it sound like we have to solve the problem. In fact I think it is a bunch of hog wash anyway. Plant a few trees like Al Gore and your carbon credits can make you feel better about not doing anything.) , or poverty, or health care, or high gas prices (which I hate as much as the next guy). Because if we don't defend ourselves against the march of Islam and we sit in front of the BOOB TUBE and get fat eating Twinkies, we just make it easier for them to do what they want to do. If we could water down the Islamic message like pastors are doing to the precious Gospel of Christ, it would be a piece of cake to defeat them but that is not happening.

So I am going to do my part today to make sure no one forgets what happened. So watch the video below and get angry again. If it makes your stomach turn to see an airplane crash into a building, GREAT! that is what your stomach should be doing. If your offended by seeing people jump from a sky scraper, GOOD, you should be offended. We as a country need to stand up and not let it happen again, or at the least do everything we can to try to prevent it. Otherwise expect to see Islam coming to your home soon. "CONVERT OR DIE" that is what they believe. So if we do nothing enjoy that Twinkie with a side of bullet to the head.

So watch and get angry!

Which Gospel?

2007-09-03T07:51:00.000-04:00

This one is a quickie. Which Gospel is your church teaching? Give it some thought.

Bad Dream Realized !!!

2007-08-13T22:13:00.000-04:00

So, I am on a video kick now. I am sure most people have seen the attached video of the skate board accident at the X-Games. But in case you have not seen it watch below. After you watch it you will think about one of those dreams where you are falling and wake up just before you hit the ground. However I think this guy wishes he was asleep before he hit the ground. Maybe you will notice that his shoes fly off when he hits the ground. Lots of people made a big deal about this, but think about it when was the last time you saw a skate boarder tie his shoes well. In today's day and age we should be lucky that his pants did not fly off.

The Exploding Whale

2007-08-12T21:28:00.000-04:00

Well, I have heard about this many times, and my sister even gave me the book for Christmas. But I find this funny every time that I hear, it read about it, or see it. I never thought about looking on You Tube until today to see the video. The last statement that the reporter makes had me in stitches. Hope you enjoy the mess.

Christian Prayer for Dummies?

2007-08-02T10:41:00.000-04:00

I think I can safely say that it seems that the Dummies books have gone a little overboard, and I think that the book shown here is proof of that.

Lets start with an example of how you learn something new. How did we all learn the English language (some better than others, my grammar is not always the best) we learned by being immersed in it. We did not know it as children, but after listening to other people speak it over and over and over again, what did we learn. We learned how to but a sentence together. I did not have to teach my children how to ask me for junk food. They learned all on their own how to do that. Now what do you think is a good way to learn how to pray.

How about you immerse yourself into it. Say by going to a church that prays, joining a small group Bible study that prays and learning by example. The same way you learned to talk to other people. You learned to talk to other people that way, why not learn how to talk to God that way.

I also don't like the titles of these books. The title itself implies that you are a Dummy and need some great insight on how to pray. How about the reading the Bible instead of a Dummies book. How about Matthew 6:5-15, Jesus show us how to pray right there in the Lords Prayer. Is this the only way to pray, heavens no however it shows us how to pray.

1 Peter 3:7 and James 4:3-4 tell us how are prayers can be hindered. Philippians 4:6 tells us how to present our requests to God. I am sure there are many more passages that speak to prayer these are only a few of the ones that I found by doing research in the Bible in the last 10 minutes or so. I don't need a Dummies book, I need the Bible and I need some good teaching from the church. Sure there is much more that I myself can learn about prayer, but I need to get that knowledge and teaching from the proper sources. Not a Dummies book.

Change of Name

2007-07-10T18:09:00.001-04:00

Well I decided that the play on words had to go. The cesspool got a little bit of a cleaning. Not sure if the current name is going to be the final or not. Most likely I need to find another play on words to be funny. So if anyone has some ideas throw them at me.

The Church of Universalism and Oprah

2007-07-10T17:46:00.000-04:00

So as a follow up to yesterdays blog, one of the comments that one of the Lutheran students made was that everyone gets to go to Heaven. The Hindu, Muslim, Mormon, Jehovah Witness, Buddhist, and all the other religions and cults that are out there. That could not be further from the truth. Jesus makes it clear in John 14:6 “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” So how can a student of Lutheranism believe that everyone gets to go heaven no mater what road of religion he is on. He is being taught bad theology. Did he read this passage? Does he read the Bible at all, I would wager a guess that many of these students don’t read the Bible every day.

Now some people will say that there can’t possible be only one way. That is to narrow minded. I would say that it is not narrow minded. God does not want to see anyone perish 1 Thessalonians 5:9 and he has provided the way for everyone to come to him and not go to hell. However you will need to find that path. Jesus also said in Matthew 7:13-14 “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” I would make a guess that most of the people that you see in a day are on the broad road that leads to destruction. Do you stand buy and wave as they march on to hell, or are you trying to help them find the narrow road.

I am not saying that I have not been the person standing and waving, but I am feeling in my heart that I need to change that myself, but I would challenge you as well to get equipped and make a difference. Will you be ridiculed and made fun of? I would bet you might 2 Timothy 3:12 says that if we want to live a godly life in Christ we will be persecuted.

So let me end with a video. Take a look at the nonsense that Oprah is spewing out on her show.

Notice that she can quote all sorts of books, however she never can quote the Bible. She also does not like the way that the conversation is going and wants to end fairly quickly. I would say that she is on the broad road leading to destruction. Oprah also has great influence on many people, unfortunately many people will listen and believe her. I challenge you, could you speak to the same people and convince them otherwise. Could you “give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have” 1 Peter 3:15, this passage ends with one more statement that is critical “But do this with gentleness and respect.”

Tired of Being Lukewarm

2007-07-09T21:48:00.000-04:00

Well it has been quite some time since I have posted here, and this is going to be a far cry from the last posts that you have seen on my site. I have tried to be humorous and light hearted, but that is going to change on this one.

One of my favorite radio shows that I listen to on my ipod every day is Way of The Master Radio. They always have segments on the show that make me think deeper into my faith in Christ and how to share that with other people. On one of the most recent programs the host of the show went to Luther Seminary in St. Paul, MN and asked students there some question. The answers that he got could almost make me choke. Before I go any further, I am either going to make people agree with God's word or I am going to make people angry with what I am about to say (Hebrews 4:12-13) . But I am basing my statements on Biblical truth and not my opinions.

So what are the questions that were asked of the Lutheran Seminary students, here they are.

Who goes to Heaven?
Who goes to Hell?
Is homosexuality a sin?

There were some others but those were the primary questions asked. So what kind of answers would you have expected.

People that have repented and turned from there sins and believe in Christ. (Romans 10:9-10 and Luke 13:3)
People that have not repented and believe in Christ (Romans 2:5-8 and Revelation 21:8)
Yes! (1 Corinthians 6:9-10 and Romans 1:26-27)

Well those are not the answers that were given by the Lutheran Seminary students and PROFESSORS, no wonder the students have it wrong, so do the professors. So here are some of their answers. I am giving you the most outrageous however they were all over the map on these questions. Biblical they were all wrong.

"Everyone goes to Heaven" "I am not sure" (Your in seminary and don't know the answer to this yet, bad sign) "People that believe and accepted Jesus" (Accepted Jesus? where is that in the Bible? Jesus needs to accept us not the other way around)
That is not for me to judge. (They were quick to point out who would go to heaven, however no one wanted to tread down the road of who would go to hell.)
"Nope not a sin" "The action is a sin put the person is not sinfull" (WHAT)

It was hard for me to keep the car on the road while I was trying to swallow all the answers that these students were giving out. I am sure that part of the problem is that they don't believe that the Bible is the infallible word of God, as they stated to the host of the show. They felt that the Bible was written by man and had mistakes in it. (Proverbs 30:5-6 and 2 Timothy 3:16-17)

So that is just some of what was discussed, and they had another two hours on the Episcopal church. Seemed to have the same pathetic answers to the questions that were asked during those two hours as well.

So I am tired of being a luke warm Christian. It may take me some time to get up to the point were I talk a lot about my faith to people in public, however I am getting my spiritual armor on and I am sharpening my sword of the Spirit which is the word of God. (Ephesians 6:10-17) so that when the time comes I can give an answer to someone as to the hope that lies within me. (1 Peter 3:15)

The Hazzards of Spelling !

2007-03-21T22:05:00.000-04:00

OK, Have I got you wondering by the title, what possibly could be hazardous about spelling. Well I thought the same thing until today.

KZ is going through the Hooked on Phonics reading program and as you step through all the books every so often you get to a part that you have to spell words that you are learning using letter cards that are in the kit. So we get to this part of the book and have been on this part of the one book for that last few days reviewing. KZ has had some trouble at this part and we continue to practice until he gets it right. The words that he has been learning are all start with Sh, Th, Wh, and Ch.

Moving on here, we get the cards and start stepping through all the words that the book wants him to spell. Today compared to the other days he is doing very well and getting the words in just a few tries. Then we come across the word "SHOT". This is where it starts to get funny. He sounds the word out and get the S and the H right, but instead of and O he thought that it was spelled with and I and a T. Yes, that is right my son is already spelling swear words. I looked at it and had a hard time not laughing. KZ noticed that I was having a problem and asked me what was so funny. Not trying to kill the great progress I told him nothing and said that he had one of the letters wrong and had to make a change. So he looks at the word that he just spelled and pronounces it wrong a few times and then by golly he actually says the swear word correctly! Now this is where I really almost loose it altogether. I kept my composure and never told him what the word was or meant and he made the change necessary to make the word right. So we dodged a bullet this time. I am sure one of the two princesses may make the same mistake, but next time I will be prepared that the mistake may occur.

Lets hope he does not have to spell DUCK any time in the near future.

SNOT Wonderful SNOT!!

2007-03-15T21:50:00.000-04:00

Well it has been over a month since I last posted anything on the blog. Hard to believe but I have been pretty busy. So I have had this post in my brain for awhile, time to get it on the site.

Snot..... a topic that my wife does not like to talk about, and I am sure she wishes that it did not even exist. However it does and anyone with little kids should know, you are going to see it at sometime as a parent weather you want to or snot! The other day CG was sitting at the dinner table and sucking on her thumb, now when CG sucks her thumb usually her pointer finger goes right up her nose. Hey why not your hand is that close to two of your body cavities why not start filling them up with fingers. I am surprised she has not filled up both nostrils with fingers. I guess you have to leave one passage clear for breathing however. But Mrs. Clean and I usually tell her to get her finger out of her nose, and most of the time she does so with out complaining. But not this time, her response and I am quoting "I want to get something out of it!" OK, well you can't argue to much with that why else would you stick your finger in your nose.

To continue on the topic and to further gross out my wife, what is the typical thing that you see kids do when they are congested and have more snot than they know what to do with. Do you see them run to the tissues and blow there nose. Heavens no, that would take precious time away from playing. I have a sleeve right here on my shirt. What do I need a tissue for? So their shirt turns into the snot rag. Or option number two is the old "suck and swallow" routine. You know what I mean, the kid starts to inhale trying to get any air through the clog in his nose and it sounds like they are trying to start a flooded lawn mower and when they can suck in no more the big gulp trying to get it down. Both quite effective if you don't have a tissue.

Then later in the month I had another snot moment with a co-worker. She was sitting at her desk in NYC and asked me if it was cold outside. My first thought was of course it was cold out, and I said well yes it is cold out. She says to me well is it REALLY cold out. My comment to her was "you mean like freeze the snot in your nose cold?" she laughs and says yes like that. I say "nope not that cold."

So I am sure that I grossed some people out but that it what snot is all about, grossing people out, I don't see much of any other purpose in it, unless your starting a collection! Until next time enjoy your snot responsibly.

Things That Make You Go Hmmmm!

2007-02-03T08:54:00.000-05:00

Well this was a spurt of the moment post this morning. Sometimes you just catch a moment with a kid and have to run with it.

CG is who I think is going to grow up into the typical last born comedian was playing in the living room while I was looking something up on the computer and I turn around and see her doing this.

Well when you have an itch and you can't reach it you adapt and find a way to scratch it. So to bad this picture is not a video but CG was rubbing her butt up against the wall in an attempt to "scratch that itch". When I saw her doing this I started to laugh and asked what she was doing. She said "I got an itch" big surprise.

Hopefully as she gets older if this part of her anatomy itches again she will be a little more discrete. 20 year old would look a little funny doing this, wait till her future husband sees this picture. Oh well I thought this was funny and so did she.

The Return of Thunderball

2007-01-27T14:05:00.000-05:00

So after all the building and tweaking of KZ's PWD (Pine Wood Derby) car we finally went to the race today. We got there early for the weigh in and to make sure that we would not have to tweak his car. Again his car weighed in dead on 5oz which is the limit. He had to give it a name during the weigh in and "Thunder" was the name of his car.

The race started around 10:30 and they raced first by rank. The Bears, Wolves, Weblos 2, Tigers and Weblos 1. So unfortunately KZ had to wait a long time from the time that we got to the school until he got to see his car go. Was the wait worth it. You bet.

So when the tigers got up to race this is how the race worked. There was a point eliminationn system that was used. 1st place got 0 points, 2nd place got 1 point, and 3rd place got 2 points. When you got a total of 3 points you were eliminated from competition. So every scout got to have 3 races.

So get ready for this in the Tiger division KZ got 0 points over about 7 races. Meaning that KZ never lost a race in the Tiger division, and won the first place trophy. A shark came close to beating him but never did. You can see from the photo how close it was. KZ car is the green one.

His cars fastest time was 2.317 seconds. Very good time for a first time racer. I knew however that he would not be the pack winner based on his fastest speed. There we already cars that were running speeds of 2.299 and faster. So I knew that his winning streak would come to an end.

After all the ranks run their races, they run the pack championship. Again the same point system is in effect. KZ came in 7th overall. I would guess that there were 40 or so cars overall. So coming in seventh out of 40 is not that bad for the first time.

In the championship KZ's last race, he came in third which gave him his total of 6 points and elimanated him. As can be seen from the photo it was very close. He lost by .003 seconds!

So I would say that we had a good race day and we have some improving that we can do for next year. At least we have a time that we can try to improve upon. Next year we are going to be shooting for 2.299 or better. So below are some of the phots of the winner and his car and trophy.

Hi Ho, Hi Ho It's Off to Buffalo !!!

2007-01-20T12:34:00.000-05:00

I have had a crazy few days! So here is the itinerary.

Thursday 5:00am - leave my house to head to Exton, PA (45 min away) to catch the Amtrak train to NYC that leaves at 6:11

Thursday 5:30am - realize that I left the train tickets at home and I would have to go back and get them. Yippie!!!!!

Thursday 5:45am - Leave home again, this time in route to Philadelphia 30th Street station to intercept train that I am missing due to ticket foul up.

Thursday 6:30am - Made it to the train station with time to spare to get the train.

Thursday 8:30am - Made it to NYC and worked there for the day and stayed for the night.

Friday 9:00am - Waiting for person to show up for interview.

Friday 9:45am - Still waiting!!!!

Friday 10:00am - Still waiting !!!

Friday 10:15am - Call recruiter about possible tech and found that he can't reach him either. Guess he is not the guy. Also received call from Mrs. Clean (aka: sicko) she is not doing well, I decide that I will get early train home to help.

Friday 10:35am - Phew, just made the train to go home.

Friday 1:00pm - Made it home and have to get on conference call at 2pm that I forgot about.

Friday 2:00pm - Not much help for the kids!!

Friday 2:30pm - Call comes from tech in Buffalo and service call is not going well there. (Based on post title you can see where this is going.)

Friday 3:15pm - Decision has been made that I have to go to Buffalo, NY on Saturday to resolve customer issue.

Friday 4:30pm - All the plans are in place for me to leave and go to Buffalo.

Friday 5:30pm - Go run out and get dinner out (quick and easy, and Stanley paid, even better)

Friday 6:00pm - Get some time to spend with the kids. KZ breaks my heart when he tells me that he does not want me to leave again. Spends time crying while I play with SM and CG. Spend some time reading with KZ once he calms down some.

Friday 7:30pm - put the kids to bed.

Friday 7:45pm - get about 15min with Mrs. Clean.

Friday 8:00pm - Race out the door to meet my manager and catch flight to Buffalo.

Friday 10:40pm - Sitting on plane ready to go.

Saturday 12:15am - Find that National Car Rental (place that I reserved car) is not open. GREAT!! Walk to Hertz and get a car with GPS. YIPPEE!!! A new toy to play with.

Saturday 1:00am - Head hits the pillow. GOOD NIGHT!!!!

Saturday 6:30am - Head off the pillow. GOOD MORNING!! What day is it now? Get up get ready to go and eat breakfast and drive to customer site.

Saturday 7:45am - On site and working on problem that other techs have been working on since Wednesday.

Saturday 12:00pm - Leave customer site call US Air and race to catch the 1:10pm flight to Philadelphia. Make it with about 30min.

Saturday 12:53pm - Sitting in airport typing this up waiting for plane. Notice a problem. I should be on the plane now. Plane is just pulling up. Will add the rest later.

Saturday 1:30pm - Plane is leaving 20 minutes late however, pilot says that we should be early arriving due to tail wind, aka TURBULENCE!! We are on a small DeHaviland Dash 8 airplane that bounces around a lot. No biggie I sleep most of the way home.

Saturday 2:00pm - Landing is getting very rough and the lady behind me has the urge to regurge!! I feel sorry for her. However the aroma left in the plane I could really do with out.

Saturday 2:15 - Plane lands on one wheel. In all honesty this made me a tad nervous, but pilot was a pro and got it on all three in no time. Stewardess says that is how they have to land in windy conditions. Not sure about that. But keeps the passengers calm.

Saturday 3:00pm - Have my bags and I am in the car on my way home.

Saturday 4:00pm - Finally I am at home and can start to wind down. Looking forward to my own bed.

Saturday 6:30pm - Have a movie night with the kids. Watch the Christopher Reeve "Superman" with them. Wish I could have flown like him. All this travel would have been a lot easier.

Saturday 8:30pm - All kids tucked in and going to sleep.

Saturday 9:00pm - All is quite in the house and I am looking forward to 2 days off and no trip to NYC this week. My manager let me take Monday off with all of the hub bub that just went on.

THE END

Goofy Human Nature.

2007-01-16T06:21:00.000-05:00

While I was waiting for the train to NYC this morning. I witnessed something that I have before but today it struck me as very funny.

My train was schedule to leave at 5:52am and I was at the station around 5:20, along with some other people that were going to be on the same train I was based on where they were sitting in the train station. So for about 20 min. most of the people are sitting on one of the benches, reading the paper, working on computer or just relaxing.

Then it happens! What is the "it" you say, the "it" is the first goof ball to go stand in line waiting to go down to the platform. Well after "it" goes to get in line (here comes the goofy human nature) every other "it" has to go get in line behind him. Like good little lemmings the flood gates have opened and everyone now feels like they have to jockey for position to get in line.

So I bet you are wondering if I went and got in line. NO, I will admit the first few times I did however after making this trip as many times as I have you learn you don't have to. Then the conductor comes and opens the rope to let people start to go down and the Lemming line starts to work its way forward. But hey they open up the whole stair well for everyone to walk down. What a novel concept I don't have to stand in line.

While the 50-60 people or so are in line. I am still sitting on one of the benches and wait for them to open the whole stairwell. I would say that I was one of the first 10 people down to the platform. You know that there was someone in line thinking "hey what is he doing, I got in line".

Now I bet all of us at one time or another have gotten in line with all the lemmings. But maybe this will make you think why the heck am I doing that. Now if we are talking Southwest Airlines that is another story. I will beat people up to get on the plane first so that I don't get stuck sitting between two 300 lbs. guys. We all now that if you are last on SWA you will be in a middle seat.

Anyway, watch for goofy human nature through out your day, you will probably get a good laugh out of it, even if you are part of it.

Pinewood Racing 27 Years Later

2007-01-14T14:47:00.000-05:00

27 years ago, or so, I built the white car shown in the pictures with my Grandfather to race in my Cub Scout pack. I am not sure if it was my first Pinewood Derby car or not however of the two that I saved this is the one that I like the most. I have also given it to KZ for him to enjoy and play with it.

Now one thing that I think that you will notice is the difference in design after 27 years. You start out with a block of wood and some wheels. What it looks like after you are done is up to the Scout and what his Dad is capable of.

My recollection is that I never once won a race in my years as a Cub Scout. As a Dad and all around general guy, I am very competitive and I hate to lose. So with that in mind I had to come up with some way to design a car that might have a fighting chance, not like the aerodynamic beast that I built. I still think it looks good though.

So I went out and bought a book that talks about how to design a car that will win. Many of the tips we did not use for two reasons. 1) KZ did not want to do them, and it is his car, I did not push him if he did not want to do something. 2) Some of the tips would have violated the rules of the pack race. So we went and used one of the plans in the book. First thing you will notice is that KZ's car is much more aerodynamic. We should be better off just because of that.

The book is full of scientific ways to make your car go faster. Needless to say science was not my strong suit. Now I was never any great student in school, but there were some classes that I did really well at. The classes that I got to play with something and get my hands on ie. photography and computer science. So if I get to play with some sort of tool and I need to read a book to get the outcome that I want, the motivation is much greater to read the book and follow the instructions.

So we have a little more tweaking to get the car the exact way that we would like and be ready. But for the most part you are seeing the final version of the car "The Dragon Claw". There is another devision that I could have raced a car that I built on race day. This division has no rules and the cars can be built in any fashion with any tricks you want to try. I am looking forward to next year and I will build my own car and pick up my boyhood dreams of racing and winning.

Mrs. Clean is probably cringing at this already, for she knows my competitive nature and how much it can COST!!!!

How Is Your Cell Servi.....................

2007-01-11T16:52:00.000-05:00

What is it about cell phones that we like so much? Is it being able to make calls where ever we go? Is it the ability to be reached where ever we are?

I would bet that it is not because they work like a nuclear submarine, non-stop. I have come to this conclusion about my own cell phone, Ok my own WORK cell phone. I am a tech junkie, if I can find that there is some neat reason to have some new technology I will find a way to get it at some point in my life. For example DVD player for the car. Reason to have, keeps kids quite on long car trips. So when I got my newest Nextel phone for work, due to the fact that I broke the other one, I was felt good, all the new features had me hooked. It has Bluetooth, a camera, and an MP3 and I was thinking WOW this is cool.

Maybe however I should have been more concerend about how the phone works, since that is what I really have it for. Now the phone service is ok. No wait let me rethink that it STINKS. I can't get good reception in my office where I get lots of calls on it due to the fact that customers know the number and call me there. On the train to and from NYC, the train might go about 3 train lenghts and it drops my call. In the car it drops out routinly at one particular spot on my way home. So I give the default "if my phone drops I will call you back" message.

At times I have been on a call in the car for 30 min. or more and then it drops. Of course this will be when you are on hold with someone or just gotten through to someone after going through the War and Peace of voice mail prompts and button pushes. When that happens I come darn close to opening the car window and chucking the phone into the woods. Maybe Rocky and Bullwinkle can get it to work better than I can.

I was once using the phone to call Nextel for support and it started to drop the call, you know how that goes the reception gets worse and worse until it is dropped. The last thing I heard the Nextel rep say was "are you there?" I am not sure if she heard me but my response was "Yes I am on your crappy Nextel phone?"

So maybe in the future the cell phones will get better and we will all be happy. However I don't think that they wil..................................

I call you back when I get in range!

The Palace is Complete

2007-01-02T22:37:00.000-05:00

Once upon a time in a home far, far away, a mom and a dad made some special girls very happy. They went and changed the room that they lived in from a small little dungeon to a large palace. The girls were very very happy, and mom and dad were very very tired. So some pictures were taken and the room was slept in, and all was happy in the house. THE END.

New Princess Palace

2006-12-29T07:32:00.000-05:00

Here are the pictures of the new room for the to girls SM and CG. They do not know that they are getting a new room. Right after Christmas all Three kids went to Grandmas, the main reason was so that all of this work could take place in secret.

These pictures were taken on Friday morning. I will be at home working today and Ms. Clean will be working hard to complete the room. For those not familiar with what was in this room before, we had our office in this room, which was a 3x5 desk and all the computer paraphernalia on it. The desk s still in the room and can be seen in one of these pictures. We also had a sofa bed, and a full size bed in the room. The sofa bed is now down in the living room and the two other sofa's that were there are being given to a family member. The full size bed is now in the girls old room which is now our new guest room. And the office will be in the living room in a new hutch that my in-laws are giving to us that we will be getting this weekend.

We are very excited to see what the girls think of the new room that they have. We both think that they are going to love it. We feel that the space will be great for them as they grow up.

KZ may be a little jealous about it however he has his own room and does not have to share with anyone. He may like the fact however that he won't be able to hear the girls talk and talk when they go to bed now. In their old room the girls could be easily heard through the wall in KZ's room. So over all things should be good. We still have a lot to get done though.

Cub Scouts and Chirstmas

2006-12-23T09:10:00.000-05:00

We went to KZ's Cub Scout Pack meeting this week and it was quite the show.

It was the Christmas show and each den had a little skit to do. Most of the skits were very cute, one thing we learned very early on in the show is that young Cub Scouts have no concept of how to USE A MICROPHONE!!!

Now not to completely blame the Scouts the leaders, DID NOT TURN IT DOWN!!!

So at the end of each skit there was some kid that felt that they needed to hear voice in the Space Shuttle and this would be his one shot at making that happen.

But it was fun anyway. KZ got his first awards at this meeting. KZ is the only one wearing the hat in the picture and he got lots of beads to put on the paw print on his shirt pocket.

Hopefully next time there won't be any time for the Scouts to talk in a Mic.

Next is the Pinewood Derby, and I plan on winning. Oh I mean KZ plans on winning. I bought two car kits to work on KZ and I will practice on the first car the tips that I have gotten from a Pinewood Derby speed book. Then I am going to have Zach do it all by himself on his own car, once he knows how to do the work. So in the end we should have to identical cars.

Will keep you updated on how the race goes once it is over. Race is in January.

Small Group Christmas Party

2006-12-23T08:41:00.000-05:00

On the 17th we had our small group Christmas party at a friends house. Our friends have 20 acres of land and quite the lot of animals around. They invited us to come a little early and have some time to ride the horse.

CG was the second one to go for the ride and she was a little unsure at first but I am sure that the experience that she had at Nan and Pop's helped to make her decide that this would be fun. Plus she does not like to let her brother and sister to show her up.

SM was the first to get a ride and she was very excited about it. She got to go with our friend and also by herself with someone leading the horse for her. She could not get enough of the horse she wanted to keep riding and riding.

Mrs. Clean went third and was going to go by herself and guide the horse. Mr. Ed had other ideas however. It looked as if he could only turn right and did not want to go any direction that Mrs. Clean wanted to go. He did however want to go to the garage. Maybe he wanted to get parked in the warm house. Good thing he did not go all the way in or Mrs. Clean would have been removed from the horse by the house.

I was asked if I wanted to ride the horse and I turned it down. I prefer to ride machinery. I get to control it and it does not have a mind of its own. SM and CG wanted to go with me, and with 20 acres to explorer we had lots of fun. I opened and up and got "my horse" racing across the pasture. SM loved it CG thought I was going a tad fast and told me so. But they both had fun racing around on the 4 wheeler.

KZ was not left out. He got himself in quite a bit of trouble before going and his punishment was that he would not be able to ride the horse. I was not aware at the time of punishment that there was a 4 wheeler. I did let him go out with 2 other boys on the 4 wheeler and he couldn't get enough of it. He did still ask to ride the horse after the 4 wheeler, so I feel that the punishment did have some effect. But we all had a great time before and during the party.

Indiana Jones 4, Yippieeeeee, .......Oh Wait!

2006-12-23T08:33:00.000-05:00

Indiana Jones 4 is in the works. It may take another 20 years before the actor will be ready to start shooting the movie however. But if they can do it with Star Wars why can't they do it with Indy.

KZ has seen, and loves the Indian Jones pics. I was not home the day that this picture was taken so not sure what prompted the dress up session. But I think KZ will fill in nicely once there is a script. The movie might not have much dialoge if it started filming today, unless it includes a lot of the words, "pig wig can hit"

The Evil Digit !

2006-12-12T21:05:00.000-05:00

You get to see all sorts of things when you visit NYC. Take a look at the attached picture, see anything missing? I think my kids could even figure this one out. My NYC office is on the 20th floor, or is it.

Yes, by now you have probably noticed that the 13th floor is missing. Oops, the 13th floor is not missing, some doofus decided to label the 13th floor number 14. I know that some people are superstitious and all but if you were really superstitious about the number 13 do you think you would be on the 14th floor?

A comedian that I heard on XM radio one day was talking about this problem. He said that the 14th floor is the 13th floor and if you don't think so jump out the window a count the floors on the way down, you will hit the ground a floor sooner!

But then if you completed the test, being superstitious of the 13th floor will no longer be a problem. So my office is on the 19th floor, I wish people could get it right.

New York vs. Boston

2006-12-05T07:07:00.000-05:00

New York Yankees Vs. Boston Red Sox. This is one of the most bitter revelries in baseball. The fans dislike each other, OK HATE each other. I being a Yankees fan, makes sure I watch these games. I may miss all the others but I do my best to watch all of these games. By the way the Yankees swept the Sox in 5 games last season and killed the Sox's chance at post season.

Now lets compare New York and Boston from another perspective. The perspective I am going to use is that of a business traveler (big surprise) and what I have experienced.

Let's start with the roads. In NYC the roads make sense they go north, south, east and west and they make sense to anyone that has been in the city more than once. You go uptown or downtown, and west side or east side, makes sense to me. If you can count I would feel quite confident that you would be able to get around the city. Seems a little overwhelming at first. Now side step here for a moment to a money lesson. Manhattan was purchased for 60 Guilder from the Indians. Now your saying what is a guilder? 1.5 Guilder equals a daalder. 1 daalder equals 1 dollar. Now were talking money you understand. Got all this info from Wikipedia. So Manhattan was bought for 20 Bucks, what a steal, (side thought here, did you ever wonder what the Indians needed money for, why did they think this was a good idea?) and I pay 200 for the shoe box I sleep in, I think they got a good return on their money. So the people that were smart enough to buy an Island for 20 bucks, were smart enough to make roads that people could understand.

Now Boston, for those of you familiar with Boston history, you may recall that the roads were based on old cow paths. That's right I said cow paths. Does this seem to make sense to any of you? I mean who lets a flatulence belching bovine decide where the roads are going to go. Mankind was able to build a ship, sail from England to Massachusetts, in an age without GPS, but was not smart enough to realize that letting a dumb as a rock animal that we turn into hamburgers decided where the roads would go, would be a bad idea? Now I am sure that if I stayed here long enough they would make sense to me as well. However trying to leave the airport was a mish mash of driving around following all sorts of airport exit signs. Then you go through the "big dig" which took 13 years to get to 94% complete opened on 2004, and oh by the way the roof has this neat trick falling down and killing newlyweds. They were on there way to the airport for their honeymoon, rough way to start a marriage. Maybe it's because they can't say R's in Massachusetts, (Notice no R's in state name) so the roof is really a oof. Maybe I found a major construction flaw. By the way the big dig also leaks. A tunnel that goes underwater that leaks, no wonder people drive 90 MPH they don't want to be in the tunnel when a section of the oof falls that was keeping the water out. Now I am sure that my wife will remember this the next time we are in Boston driving through, she will be telling me to drive faster.

Now I do give more kudos to the hotel that I am staying at in Boston (in the Burbs) not quite the same comparison. But I can spread my arms out. So if you were to ask me which city to visit I would probably tell you NYC, at least the oof's don't fall on newlyweds.

Return of the Cone Heads!

2006-11-26T16:28:00.000-05:00

Does this look like a familiar picture to anyone? The annual ritual of making our children happy by making them look like cone heads.

It was CG's special day today and we had a small party at Grandma's house. YIPPEE !! it wasn't at my house. Don't get me wrong I love my kids and all, but I don't like having all the kids (that are not mine) mess up my house. I used to look at people that would spend a fortune at a place the sells pizza and has a mouse come out and say hi to the kids (can't say the name I now hate this place, but I bet you know what place I am talking about) like they were nuts. After three kids I now understand, your not paying for the pizza and the mouse, you are paying to keep everyone out of your house and the stress that goes with it. Well CG had a great day, it was a Dora the Explorer birthday.

Her brother had some fun as well. As you can see he decided that he would be the triple cone head, or punk rocker can you see the resemblance? If he decides to go this route as a teenager he is going to look like me by force.

I Can't Drive 55 !!!!!

2006-11-26T12:54:00.000-05:00

This is one one of my favorite rock songs, "I Can't Drive 55" by Sammy Hagar. However sometimes living by that philosophy, can get me in trouble. As it did the other day. I was visiting my mother-in-law and was traveling down the road that heads to her house and I got busted.

The speed limit / recommendation, was 35 MPH. Now usually I try not to be 10 MPH over the recommendation, this time my foot was a little heavier than usual (I should have a license plate that reads "Pb Foot", go back to chemistry class to figure it out) and I was not paying attention. As I was traveling (flying) down the road, out of the corner of my eye I see one of Pennsylvania's finest.Now why is it that no matter when you see one of these beautiful cars sitting on the side of the road you hit the breaks and slow down. Why don't we look at the speedometer and say hey I am driving the speed limit and all is good. I would guess it it because most of us don't drive the speed limit. So we assume that we are driving to fast and need to slow down.For me however at that point it was too late. I was busted! I slowed down as soon as I saw him and I knew he was going to pull out and test his lights to make sure that they were working, right behind me! So I pulled into the nearest neighborhood and started the routine of digging through all the other trash in the glove box looking for my registration, insurance, and thank goodness I had my license. My wife knows all to well that there are times that I leave my licences at home by accident. v>

So I gave the nice trooper my info and he tells me why he pulled me over. "Sir, you were going 53 in a 35 zone". Ouch! 18 MPH over the limit. This is going to hurt. Mr. Trooper takes the info that I have provided and walks back to his car to write me a note (or ticket). Whatever you call it we all know that we don't ever want to get one. As the officer is in his car my wife and I are already discussing

What Were They Thinking!

2006-11-09T19:06:00.000-05:00

Well you see all sorts of things in NYC, and this was one of them. This was hanging inside a building on Lexington Ave. in NYC. This is a very high class building.

Now, what is the first thing that comes to mind when you see these. If you mind works like mine, the first thing I thought was boy some big urinals. Notice the door on the right, these things are about 8' tall.

Now as Paul Harvey would say "now for the rest of the story". The person that was responsible for buying and having this .....interesting art work installed was on site as they were being put in. Preface that with the fact that the building was still under construction and there were construction workers in the building. Now we all know how subtle construction workers can be. So one of them said "looks like and elephant urinal". The art purchaser heard this comment and left the building in tears. I guess she should have taken a guy along when she was looking at buying this art work. Or at least walked into a men's room. Two pictures look alike don't they?

Stuck in a Closet

2006-11-03T08:09:00.000-05:00

So I have been going to NYC on a weekly basis for about the last 3 weeks now. Quite and interesting experience.

Now I have been to NYC before as a tourist however not in the capacity of a business traveler that has to stay over night. So the last few times that I have had to stay in a hotel, the price and the SIZE or lack there of has been surprising.

I have stayed at two hotels in the Manhattan area. One was the Hotel Pennsylvania, supposedly a famous hotel in Manhattan. Two hundred bucks for the night and the AC did not work. I was very hot and uncomfortable for the whole night. The next morning I find that the shower head was placed at a level for say ................. my son who is a whopping 4 feet tall. However for me at 6'1" my chest gets quite the blast of water, and for those of you that know me and the condition of my head, soaking my head before shaving makes me look like a cripple that can't stand up straight in the shower (Sorry to give you all that image, I know it is burned in your mind now). So I decided that I would not be returning to this hotel.

Hotel two Econo Lodge, the name is quite deceiving for a hotel in NYC, nothing Econ about it. Cost $206.00 per night. I think the room was smaller than the last one. I could shimmy around the bed but walking like a normal human was kind of out of the question. As you can see from the picture, if someone was sitting at the desk you can forget getting to the bed. Now on to the pluses. The shower head was actually above my head, and the AC in the room did work and I was quite comfortable. So I think I have found the place that I will be staying for the times I have to go up to NYC. The "NOT ECONO LODGE" on 47th st.

Tales From the Dark Side

2006-11-01T20:14:00.000-05:00

Well it was Halloween yesterday and the kids could not wait to walk around the neighborhood and collect all the tooth rotting candy they could from every possible person that they could. So around 5:30 I started to get them ready to go. KZ decided to go as the evil Lord Vader, SM was a fish in the sea, Princess Ariel, and CG was a butterfly.

Now CG thought she was Luke Skywalker. Before we left for the night she says to me "KZ is Darth Vader" yup that is right I said. Then to show that she has seen the movie and knows it a bit well she says "Darth Vader is my father!" I got a good laugh out of that.

So off we go candy collecting, and did we make out. We have about 5 pounds of candy that mostly I will eat. I must sacrifice my body for the well being of my children, or in the famous words of Spock "The needs of the many out weigh the needs of the few!" So next time you see me and my teeth look rotten and falling out and I weigh 20 more pounds (yes that's right I said 5 pounds of candy, however once eaten it multiplies by 4. So my recommendation don't eat 20 pounds of candy) you will know that it was because I love my kids so much that I did this.

To Puke or Not to Puke That is the Question......

2006-11-01T19:54:00.000-05:00

So have you ever gotten up in the morning and known that you are going to have a crummy day? Well that is what happened to SM and CG the other day. They both got up and lasted about one hour before the fun began. CG was laying in mom and dad's bed when it started. You know what I mean that feeling that starts in you toes and works it's way up through your legs, into your stomach (key location) and up to you head. Specifically your mouth and then if you are lucky into your throne of choice.

CG however did not make it to her throne of choice, I don't even think that she knew that she was supposed to go to the throne. She doesn't use it for anything else why would she go there? After her first experience with the urge to regurg, CG decided that it was best to just put her hands over her mouth and keep it in that way. Not totally successful however. So KZ and Mrs. Clean we on constant vigil to throw something in front of CG to catch the deposit.

SM was not far behind in the regurg department, however she is a great sprinter and does make it to the throne quite often. About every half hour to be precise, for most of the day. As you can see from the picture, she wised up and just decided to park herself in front of the alter, making it much easier to deposit the sacrifice.

Well after a morning of playing catch the puke and praying to the porcelain convenience, the fun ended. AMEN! and they were both fine by dinner time. Hopefully that won't happen again anytime soon. If it does I hope it doesn't start in my bed.

EVOC in the BRT

2006-10-28T16:06:00.000-04:00

So I have been a member of a fire department for the last 2 years and I am just now starting to drive the BRT. Mrs. Clean is not as happy about it as I am. But she has been a trooper through the whole thing. So what is EVOC you ask, it stands for Emergency Vehicle Operations Class. In other words how to keep the BRT from looking like this. So today, I got to sit in class all day and here horror stories of drivers that had accidents, and ultimately why I would not ever want to drive the BRT. Because in our sue your pants off society, you will be at fault if any one runs into you even when you have come to a complete stop and then slowly go through an intersection. And if that happens I will then have no money and may end up like this. But one thing I know is that no matter what happens when I am driving that God is good and will be watching out for me and everyone that I may come in contact with. Maybe contact was not the right word when talking about driving and crashing. So if you see me on the road in the BRT or anyone else on the road in any town in the USA in the BRT trying to get to an emergency please move to the right and let us pass. And if my small little plea does not convince you to move. Think about this, our tower truck weighs 80,000 pounds, your car if your lucky is about 2,000-3000 pounds. Even if the driver of the fire truck is at fault and you and he have a collision who do you think would win the collision? And if your car looked like that would it really matter who was at fault. Maybe to the surviving family members and the courts but most likely not to you.

Tomorrow, the driving portion of class.

Roaring Tiger, Crouching Dad, Part 2

2006-10-26T13:03:00.000-04:00

So after the archery off we go to the BB guns. The weapon of choice for any self respecting 6 year old that wants to "shoot your eye out". For those of you not familier with that line start watching your Christmas movies. So here we are at the shooting range, the first time that KZ has ever picked up a gun of any fashion that has a projectile that actually shoots out the end of it. Unless you count suction cup darts, in that case he has had a gun and bow and arrow that he has used. In fact he wanted to play William Tell with his sister the first time he got the bow and arrow. I 'll save that story for another time.

So we all march in and sit down to listen to the instructor that thinks BB guns are the same as a .50 caliber sniper rifle and gives us the safety lecture. Don't get me wrong I think that the safety is very important, and I so much as told KZ that if he did not follow the instructions given I would remove him from the range myself. We also had to here the instructor tell us that the big bad government wanted to take our guns away and to vote for Charlton Heston in November, if we cared about protecting ourselves.

Now onto the shooting. I gave KZ some tips about using the sites on the gun and lineing them up however it is pretty hard to know if he is doing it right. KZ does not have a hole in the back of his head like the Six Million Dollar Man doll that I had when I was a kid. So the only way I could tell if he had it some what right was weather or not he actually hit the target.

He did, in fine fashion. He had about 19 holes in the paper when he was done and about 4 of them were in the black center section of the target (about 3" in diameter). So I think that maybe we are ready to go off to Africa with the Elephant gun and take down the big game. But we are going to stop and vote first.

2006-10-25T23:23:00.000-04:00

ROARING TIGER, CROUCHING DAD, DAY

Mr. Clean and KZ went to Tiger Cub day up at the local Scout camp. The day did not start all that well. I woke up late and had to wake up KZ to even get him ready for the day. (Why is it that the times that I want him to be up at the crack of dawn he is never up?) Well after a quick breakfast and getting ourselves together we pulled out of the driveway in the yuppie mobile, aka the VOLVO and went to camp. We had no idea what to expect and were looking forward to all the things that the Scouts had planned for the day.

When we got to the camp we started by........ Standing in line! WHOO HOO! We had to register and find out what our group schedule was for the day. They had five events planned for the kids during the day. Our order was 1) Nature Hike (in other words run around in the woods, find a stick and whack everything you can with it until Dad chucks it further in the woods in frustration and then start the process all over again) 2) Games 3) Craft 4) Archery 5) BB Guns. I must admit I think that we had the best order for the day. If the Archery and BB Guns had come first the rest of the day would not have been so bearable. It made KZ really put up with some of the more un-interesting items.

So it was not until latter in the afternoon that we got to the Archery. YIPPIE, KZ got two rounds of shooting arrows at a target that was a whopping 4 feet away. Round one, not so good. 5 arrows and here is how it went 1) HIT, about 1" for margin of error.
Hard to tell from the Photo to the left however KZ's arrow is the one closest to the left edge of the target. 2) MISS 3)MISS 4) MISS and surprise surprise 5) MISS. KZ was a little discouraged by the results of his first 5 attempts. I think he figured that this would be a piece of cake since he already had practice at Nan and Pop's and he would not have to practice to hit the target. So then he got to sit down and wait for the other 2 groups to go before he got to go again. While he was waiting, Dad gave him some pointers before round 2. Round two, he only had three arrows. Makes sense to me, can't hit it with 5, lets take some arrows away. All the adults were jumping up and down yelling YIPPIE!!, in their heads of course.

So off we go to round 2, and here were the results. Arrow 1) Dad is busy taking pictures and KZ is busy hitting the BULLSEYE DEAD CENTER. Dad was very proud, all the pointers I gave him worked! Well maybe some of them. Arrows 2 and 3 he also hit the target. So he made much improvement in 5 minutes of sitting. I guess he is ready to go hunting. After the archery we got to go to the Grand Poohba of events the BB Guns. Will follow up with that later.